Monday, September 30, 2013

The Space Between

Years ago, when I listened to “The Space Between” by Dave Matthews, I thought a lot about my own interpretation of the space between.  The song gives you a lot to think about, but I took it in my own direction.  The "space between" is what makes up most of our lives.  The space between being born and starting kindergarten, entering high school and graduating from high school, moving to college and starting your first job, marriage, babies, retirement and death.  This is just a short list of some of the major highlights that make up our life.  Then there are smaller spaces, the space between birthdays, vacations, holidays, visits with loved ones, paychecks and weekends. 

What I want to focus on is the space between morning and night, each and every day that we live.  This is what defines who we are, how we choose to live our lives, how we make people feel and how we make ourselves feel.  This is incredibly important because it is how we spend the majority of our lives, which shapes our day to day happiness and our relationships with others.

I want to take this thought in 2 directions.   The first is that we need to know we have control over our day to day lives, there are always choices, we are accountable for the choices we make and we need to actively work to bring happiness into our lives.  This requires being present, living in the moment, finding ourselves, discovering our likes and dislikes and living “our” life.

The second is what makes us who we are is not often the big, visible, momentous events.  Once in a lifetime we can give money to charity, help a stranger beside the road or help a needy family.  These are wonderful acts of kindness, but it is the kindness displayed on an everyday basis that defines who we are.  On the other hand we can make mistakes, lose our patience, say or do something we regret, but this too does not define who we are.  It is the sum of our everyday actions that make us who we are, what we choose to do in the "space between".

My last point is that we need to do our best to make the space between a happy, healthy place to live.  Surround yourself with the people that make you happy.  Do the activities you love.  Fill your home with items you love.  I think many of us can agree that vacations, holidays and special events are some of the best times of our lives.  Work to bring vacations into your everyday life, mark a weekend, a day, an evening as a “vacation” and do the things that make you happy.  Maybe on vacation you enjoy relaxation, laying in the sun, reading a book, swimming in a pool, enjoying a cocktail, these are all moments you can bring into your life on a regular basis.  The people who share these moments with you also make them special, so plan events with people you enjoy being around, it does not require a wedding, a funeral or a holiday to get together and enjoy each other’s company.  The key to unlocking much of what I have just described is the ability to be grateful.  Be grateful for all of the big things, all of the little things and all of the basic things (like the air you breath) in your life.

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

~Maya Angelou 


XOXO,
Megan

Friday, September 27, 2013

The Best Things in Life are Free

Lists…aren’t they wonderful.  I have to-do lists, grocery lists, packing lists for anywhere I’ve ever gone and would like to go (beach, camping, weekend at grandma’s, one of those little bungalow’s in Bali over the water with the thatched roof, the clear glass floor, the bed with the mosquito thingy around it…you know the one J), honey-do lists and the lists go on and on.  Maybe I’ll write more about lists another day…but my point is…my life would not function without lists.

I thought no way to better kick off my blog than with my happiness list - the simplified version.
  1. My Boys (Dallas, 6 and Gavin, 4)
  2. My Mom (June aka NeNe)
  3. My Health                                          
The best things in life are free!  When applied to my life, this saying is incredibly true.  When I think about what makes me happy, it is about my relationships with others and my relationship with myself.  (Lists are free too!)  Throughout my life I’ve resisted the endless quest for happiness that is just out of reach; the thought that happiness will be skipping around the corner alongside a promotion, a bigger house, a newer car or any other shiny thing.  Two things are innately wrong with this thought for me.  The first is, as the title of my blog suggests, happiness is a pursuit.  Happiness doesn’t just show up at your doorstep and stay forever.  Happiness takes work, dedication, consistency, motivation and is a constant work in progress.  The second is, true and lasting happiness is not found in objects, this happiness is fleeting and more than likely you will never reach a stable happy place because you will always be in want of more.

 

I am happy to be alive and well.  I am happy to have people to love.  I am happy to have people that love me.

XOXO,

Megan