Live inspired. Be empowered. Own your life.

Some people say that there is strength in numbers.  I will call this outward strength or group strength.

My most inspired thoughts and my most empowered moments come when I am alone.  I will call this inner strength.

Inner strength is fundamental to being a successful, purposeful, passionate, healthy and happy human being.

What defines inner strength?

• Self-love, Self-awareness, Faith, Wisdom, Courage, Respect for Yourself & Others, Discipline, Confidence, Pride, Peace, Forgiveness, Humility, Accountability, Willpower, Kindness, Gentleness, Compassion, Understanding

Inner strength can be innate to some of us, others must work for it and unfortunately some never experience it.  If you have it, if you find it, never let it go.  It is the strength that takes you on a first date after a break-up, the strength that allows you to move on after losing someone you love, the strength to push harder when all you want to do is give up on your weight loss goal, the strength to forgive when you never thought you could, the strength to be compassionate and understanding rather than indifferent, the strength to believe in yourself when the odds are against you, the strength to live up to your potential, the strength to fight a deadly disease, or the strength to know when to give up.

I hope and wish that everyone reading this now can find that strength, can use that strength, to take the next step forward.

(I would love for you'll to comment on this topic, it's so relevant to each of us, it's so applicable to life and it is always a work in progress.)

Live inspired.  Be empowered.  Own your life.

-Megan

Friendship - Quote of the Day

DIY - Wooden Shim Masterpiece

DIY projects have a certain power over me.  They make me feel capable, resourceful, independent, strong and so very gratified.  That sounded slightly dramatic - but it's true.

With that said, without further a adieu, I introduce to you my latest DIY...

My wooden shim masterpiece!

Materials:

Nelson Wood Shims/42 Count/16" - Amazon - Shims

2' x 2' x 3/4 Inch Plywood

1"x 3" Furring strips to frame outside

1"x 2" Furring strips to frame inside

Brads - Size 1/2 x 19 (Nail gun would be great)

Nails - Size 1 1/2 x 16 (Screws would work better)

Minwax - Early American

9.5 Inch Wooden Letter - Amazon - Wooden Letter

Cotton Yarn from Walmart

Twine - Amazon - Twine

Tools:

Hammer

Jigsaw - Amazon - Jig Saw

Steps:

-Find the center of your board and start attaching the shims with your brads (1/2 x 19).  The shims are thick on one end and thin on the other.  My pattern is thick, thick, thin, thin, along the center line where they but up to each other.

(If you have a nail gun - it would make this step quicker.  I used a hammer.)

-After all of the shims are attached - they will be hanging over the edges of the plywood.  Use the jig saw to clean the edges.

-Cut the 1" x 3" furring strips to the correct size to create the frame for your plywood.  I attached the frame with nails (1 1/2 x 16), but screws would work better.

-Cut the 1" x 2" furring strips to the correct size to frame the inside of your plywood  I attached the frame with nails (1 1/2x 16), but screws would work better.

-Apply Minwax (Early American) to the entire piece.

I wanted to personalize my project so I purchased a wooden letter from Amazon and wrapped it with yarn from Walmart.

Voila - aint' it grand!

If anyone tries it - post a pic in the comments so I can see it!

Cheers to Doing It Yourself!

-Megan

Grandma Darlene

“Mom - why are you crying - that’s dad’s family not yours.”

I listened to her chase bears off the porch in her dreams, she taught me how to make cheese balls during the holidays, we talked birds, flowers and gardens, we sat and chatted for hours looking out the bay window to the mountains and drinking the tea she always had in the pitcher on the counter, we had a way of laughing together – I always loved her drama – the whirlwind she made over the smallest things – we would both end up hysterical,  we were backseat drivers on many a road trip –and she never forgot the porta potty, we’d walk through the garden and she’d show me her tallest sunflower, she’d point out her favorite goat, she’d turn her nose up at the cows – but even the animals she despised – she couldn’t help but love,  I’d smile as she enjoyed an ice cream cone or laugh when she drank beer for “medical reasons”, I’d cheer as she had a footrace with the boys, I so enjoyed my time with her.

I remember my last visit and the way her face lit up when she saw me.  She never said my name, she probably didn’t remember it, but she loved me – that I could see.  We walked around the yard, like we always did, just catching up.  She told me over and over again how much she liked the bright colors the boys wear, but no matter how many times she said it, I appreciated it every time.  She was repetitive by nature and the Alzheimer’s made her more so – but I always had the patience of a saint for her – because I adored her.

Darlene opened her home, her arms and her heart to me no matter the circumstances.  She was one of the greatest women I know and one of the people I have loved most in my life.  I have missed her and will continue to miss her dearly.  I will teach my boys, one of the greatest lessons I ever learned from Darlene, that family is not defined by boundaries and blood it is defined by love. 

“I am crying – because I miss my grandma - I love you Darlene.”

Life, Death and Everything in Between

The New Year is a time to think about life – past, present and future.   Tonight, the first night of the New Year - I am reflecting, crying, thinking, smiling and writing.  Racing through my head are years, moments, people, places, love, loss, choice, change, regret, hopes, memories, dreams….

The sum of these thoughts racing through my head is life – my life.  The good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly, the happy, the sad, the right, the wrong – it is the story of my life.

As I think about my life, I also think about my death.  I think of it not as the end – but as the grand finale of the most amazing story I could possibly write. 

You know you’ve thought about it – your funeral - who will be there, how many people will be there, what will they say, what stories will they tell, will there be laughter, will there be tears, will there be a song, will there be pictures, what will it be like?

I live with intention and purpose; I am motivated by love not fear; guided by light not darkness.  I hold my friends close, my family closer and I never stop working on my relationship with myself.

I open my eyes to see the miracle that is life, I open my heart to feel the lowest of lows and the highest of highs, I open my mind with understanding and compassion knowing that we come in all colors, shapes and sizes and life has no instructions.

When my time comes, when my eulogy is read, there will be no shortage of stories – stories of laughter, happiness, strength, courage and love.  How do I know this – because I’m writing it – each and every day of my life.  This life was handed to me – but the way I choose to live it is all up to me, I am the only one in control – and I am going to live inspired.

I will leave you with this:

• It’s your life, make the most of it, make it good, make it real, make it memorable, make it magical and own it! 
• If you have the opportunity and ability – spread the love.
• Eulogize the living – don’t wait until they are the only one in the room that can’t hear you – for goodness sake they are the ones that would appreciate your words the most.

I love the song Amazing Grace, by Aaron Neville.  It is soul stirring and the perfect song for reflection.  Listen and listen.

Much Love,

Megan

My Story - My Life

I held it in my hand – knowing what the answer would be – one line appeared and then there were 2.  

I am pregnant.

I lay on the table in Planned Parenthood – “Do you want to see the image, do you want to know if it’s twins?” – I answer with a definitive no.

I am pregnant.

I sit alone – the last to be called – watching as 1 by 1 – 2 become 1.

I am pregnant.

I did the only thing I could bring myself to do – I cry hysterically as I drive away.

I am pregnant.

I cradle my stomach, I picture her face, I smile.

I am pregnant.

I see the signs - I wake up with confirmation – I tell myself that everything happens for a reason.

I am not pregnant. 

It’s been a long time since I wrote.  At times I can’t translate my life experiences, thoughts and emotions into words.  This is one of those times.  I have so much to say, but could never begin to say it all.  I have stripped it down to the facts.  I will elaborate, when the time is right. 

I tell my story, I tell it despite the critics, despite the judgement, despite it all – because it is my story to tell and it is what I came here to do.

Xoxo,
Megan

Live Out Loud - A Storytelling Series: The Ranger and the Bitch

We have had some gorgeous weekends.  What better to do when the weather is amazing than get outside and head to the mountains?  I love driving along the skyline drive, swinging through the overlooks, going for a hike, picnicking and keeping my eyes peeled for wildlife!

I had just finished saying how much I would love to see some neat wildlife, when an itty bitty baby bear came trundling across the road in front of us.  It was the smallest, cutest, newest bear I have ever seen.  We stopped to let it across the road, then it headed up the side of a bank to meet it’s mama at the top of the hill.  What a thrill it was to watch!

Turns out – that wasn’t the only thrill we’d experience.  As we were getting ready to start driving again, a car pulled up behind us – it was a park ranger.  We started heading up the road and almost immediately saw flashing lights.  We pulled over and he approached the car growling, “License and Registration”, without skipping a beat he demanded, “Roll down your back window”, same breath, “Is there anything in the vehicle I should know about”?  At this point I’m thinking, wait a second, where was the “Do you know what you did”?  Maybe I blacked out for a minute – while I was recklessly driving, with a beer in one hand, a rifle in the other, a joint hanging on my lips, target practicing on protected species.  That would help put his rudeness into context.  I took it upon myself to ask (from the passenger seat) – “Why are you being such an ASS”?  He commences to tell me about the risk of head on collisions and how serious it is that we stopped – never even asking why we stopped.  I’m thinking, are we or are we not in the National Park where the speed limit is 35, and do you or do you not want me to steam roll a baby bear?

He heads back to his car to run the license and registration.  Then he approaches our vehicle again with the same shitty attitude.  So I ask again, “Why are you still being a DICK”?  He proceeds to gather up my license and saunter back to his car.  Eventually he returns and tells us that he has decided not to give us a reckless driving ticket, but to never yada yada yada.

Moral of the story – demand respect and reciprocate respect.  Don’t get pulled over with a feisty bitch in your passenger seat because she will enjoy every second of you squirming in the driver’s seat.  I absolutely love when people in authority are humble, genuine, nice and RESPECTFUL.  Message delivery is key.  (DO NOT STOP on the skyline drive, even if it means squashing a baby bear.)

(For all of you law enforcement officers – thank you for everything you do day in and day out – I really do respect and appreciate what you do – but there is definitely a way to approach people and situations and a way NOT to approach people and situations.  I prefer the personality of the ranger at the top of the post...awww.)

To a long life for that baby bear,

Megan