Bless Her Heart

Yesterday was Easter.  

My Facebook news feed was bursting at the seams with adorable outfits, adorable children, adorable families and LOTS OF LOVE!

Cut to the Greene County Park – and juxtapose this…

Calling them “shorts” is too much of a stretch – so we will refer to them as “boy shorts” AKA underwear.  I can just see her picking out her Easter outfit now…doing a 360 in front of the mirror in her underwear trying to decide what shoes and shirt to pair with them.  Black kitten heals – YES – they are just the ticket for our time at the park.  Pink, sheer, spaghetti strap tank top – YES – my Easter outfit is complete.  Wait, wait, wait – an outfit is never complete without accessories – good thing I have this cigarette hanging out of my mouth – it brings all the kiddies to the playground.

So – there she is – in all her glory.  She is on the phone the entire time with what seems to be her “man”.  She is talking about how hard she is trying to make their relationship work, she says, “I am ignoring them so I can talk to you”.  Good to know her priorities are in the right place – I wouldn’t want to find out that she is ACTUALLY playing with her children at the playground at the detriment of her relationship with the person on the other end of the PHONE.  “They are still fucking playing”, she says.  Apparently she was trying to get them to go – but that wasn’t even obvious to me.  “I am never bringing them back to the playground again”, she tells him.  “Put on your damn shoes”, she screams at her kids.

My eyes are wide, my boy’s eyes are wide and this experience was impressionable to me and my boys and the three of us learned something about ourselves, our family dynamic, other children, other families, other mothers and life.

To the ideas that everything is relative, growth is continuous, alignment is key, happiness comes from within and nothing is worth more than this day.

-Meg

What’s in your crawl space?

Driving to work today I saw a billboard for a pest control company with pictures of disgusting bugs and the question, “What’s in your crawl space?”  By brain made a metaphorical segueway in a nanosecond and led me to this…

Keep your mind out of the gutter – I am not talking about human anatomy.  (But if I were – my answer would be cobwebs.)

A crawl space is something most of us avoid like the plague.  If necessary I peak in – but even then – I’m holding my breath and leaning over as far as possible while standing in the light of day.  It is such a scary place, full of cave crickets, spiders, darkness, dampness, dirt and who knows what.

We all have a “crawl space” if you will.  A place that we would rather not visit that is inhabited by things we would rather not see or think about.  Maybe your crawl space has painful events from the past, negative parts of the present or fearful thoughts of the future.  It’s possible your crawl space is empty – it’s safe – but it’s still a bit dark and depressing.

What’s my point?  My point is you are not alone.  We all have moments we are not proud of that make us embarrassed or ashamed.  We all have memories or thoughts that cause us pain or heartache.  We all have experiences that make us impatient, irritable and angry.  We are all human, we are all far from perfect, but many of us are truly doing the best that we can.  Try not to let it eat away at you, to multiply, to fester and to grow.  You can accept what’s in your crawl space or you can clean it out.  Either of these options is cleansing, and freeing and positive.

 

Clean it out,

Megan

Do you know yourself?

Take One: 

Do you know yourself?

Oh hell yeah I know myself.  I am a strong independent woman who knows what I believe in, what I stand for and what I want in life – don’t doubt me!

Take Two:

Do you know yourself?

Um, I think so, what do you think, do you think I know myself, do you know me, WHO AM I?!

I OBVIOUSLY fall into the “Take One” category (wink, wink), but for those of you who fall into the “Take Two” category I recently read an article that may help you find your true self by asking 5 questions – which I’ve narrowed down to 3.

These questions are rather hard, and I think answering them honestly could be embarrassing or even painful.  But take a stab at it and see if you learn anything about yourself.

 

Who do you envy and why?

Rather than look at the negative side of envy and jealously, put a positive spin on it.  If you identify why you envy them, maybe there are changes/choices you can make in your own life to attain the very things that make you envious.

I envy people with a nuclear family, freedom and money.  This information is a starting place for me to align my life with what I value.  This tells me that I want to have plenty of money, but I want to find the freedom and flexibility to put my family first.

 

What do you lie about?

(Insert answer here.)

"Anything we try to hide is a big red flag. The lie is a disconnect between your behavior and your values." - Lisa Rankin

What do you do for fun?

What you do for fun makes you happy.  What you do for fun makes you interesting.  What you do for fun makes you, YOU!

 

I run, I hike, I take exercise classes , I go to my favorite spots for shopping, or food, or lattes, I go for drives, I do DIY projects,  I spend time with friends, I go away on the weekends…I WRITE!  What would I like to do?  I’d like to get back into photography, play the guitar and cook - just to name a few.

I am on a journey to get to know myself better.  I want to find myself - I want to find my path - I want to find where I am supposed to be and who I am supposed to be there with.

“The better you know yourself, the better your relationship with the rest of the world.” – Toni Collette

Me, myself and I,

Megan